Matchmaking The Bride To The VendorsPosted by Kim Rix on February 24th, 2010

Dear Bride and Groom,

Have you ever had that experience when you are engaging someone to carry out some work for you – whether its fitting a bathroom, servicing your car or excavating your garden – that you have a ‘feeling’ you are not going to get on with them?

That is not you being picky. That’s just your common sense kicking in highlighting that in some way your personalities clash. It could be something small and it may not affect the job at all, but you hesitate nonetheless. I’m not necessarily talking about trust here, but about the way you can communicate.

When you are engaging someone to provide a product or service for your wedding I think it’s important that your personalities match. Why? Because you are probably going to have to speak to them a lot – and during some times when you are fairly stressed out!

I would always advise my brides (or grooms) to ‘interview’ at least 3 different vendors before making a decision. A simple conversation can be enough and usually your gut instinct will tell you who you should work with.

Let me give you an example.

I was working with a fairly successful, strong-willed and organized bride about 6 months ago. We were visiting a number of florists that day and I had picked 2 for the morning that I thought she might like.

The first florist was a local vendor, fairly new to the area having just branched out on her own, but very experienced in wedding flowers. She talked through all the ideas with the bride, explained different options and showed examples. She then talked through how she would sketch out designs and send email them to her for approval so they could discuss changes without having to see each other face to face. Everything was very detailed, clear and the florist seemed totally in control.

The second florist, also a local vendor, but more established with a number of awards under her belt was much more informal. She asked about colours and flower types, took an address and said she’d be happy to send on a quote. She offered a few books to look at and point out anything that the bride liked. The whole encounter was very informal, chatty and pleasant.

Can you guess which florist my bride chose? Of course, the first! Although she thought the second florist seemed great she realized that her laid back personality would just send her into a panic. She felt the first had a reassuring business-like quality that she could relate to.

Don’t worry about judging people. They completely understand! And remember its just as hard for them to do their job if your personalities are clashing!

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Luxury Weddings in London, South East and the UK

The role of a Wedding PlannerPosted by Kim Rix on February 18th, 2010

Dear Bride and Groom,

You may have been reading this blog for a little while, or perhaps this is your first visit but you may have noticed that I offer up a lot of advice to you here. I imagined that you were perhaps starting to wonder what you could use me for if I’m giving you all my tips! Well here are a few things to demonstrate exactly what a wedding planner does for you.

Where has the time gone?

Whether you have 2 years or 2 months to plan your wedding, you never have enough time. If one or both of you are working it is even harder to find the time to call venues, suppliers etc to organize meetings, check details etc – especially when most of them are working the same hours as you are!

As a wedding planner I have the time to get information, check details, call, meet, negotiate and secure all the services you need. Believe me, it’s a lot of work and you don’t want to feel like you are making decisions in a rush!

Delegate Delegate Delegate

If you are planning a wedding on your own it is most likely that you will delegate some tasks out to friends and family to help you. But when and how do you check up on them? And what if they haven’t completed what they asked you to? Or it’s not the way you would like it to be?

If I were helping you to plan your wedding you would know every detail would be catered for and every request met, at a timetable to suit you!

Idea Generator

It can be difficult to think or be imaginative about what you want your wedding to be like when you are under pressure to get dates set, write guest lists etc. Maybe you have an idea but you have no idea how to make it a reality.

I would be at your side to translate your ideas into reality. You tell me what you are looking for, I research some ideas for you and all you have to do is choose! I can pick up on all the little details that will make it extra special for you. And you can focus on that invite list!

Contracts and Negotiation

As I have a good reputation with many suppliers, contractors and venues I can secure you great rates, excellent service and the best in the business. Negotiating can be nerve wracking and time consuming. I can take that swiftly off of your hands!

The Day

The Big Day, is your day. You should be able to enjoy it. If you are stressing about timetables, deliveries, schedules etc you will not be concentrating on enjoying yourself!

As your wedding planner I will be there to ensure that everything runs perfectly smoothly. I am your go to person, so if you have a question or request you just need to whisper in my ear and its done!

And the beauty of it is your guests won’t have a clue – they’ll just be having a wonderful time!

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Delivering the Personal Service

The Art of Negotiating ContractsPosted by Kim Rix on February 10th, 2010

Dear Bride and Groom,

I know that some of you will have read the title and panicked already! I find that, generally speaking, a lot of people are afraid of negotiation. There is a fear that you won’t get what you want or you will be overpowered by the other party’s persuasiveness or slick style.

First of all…Everyone can negotiate! It’s all about knowing what you want, what you are willing to back down on and how to arm yourself for success! Think about it. You negotiate with your partner all the time. It might be about the destination of your holiday, the date of your wedding or which restaurant you want to go to that weekend.

Think about these simple things when you are negotiating a contract and you will be cool, confident and come out with what you want.

Prepare!

- Make a list of exactly what you want from the supplier or service provider. (As much detail as possible if you can!)

- Make a list of a few things that you would be happy to compromise on if it came to it. Eg. A change in delivery time, one less vegetarian option, eustoma instead of sweet peas.

- Set a limit to how much you are willing to spend.

- Shop around and get a few separate quotes and recommendations.

- Shortlist your favourite suppliers and arrange meetings.

Discuss

- Take your notes with you to the meeting.

- Take plenty of notes about what they tell you and discuss any comparisons with other companies / suppliers with them. They will work hard to secure your business – especially if it’s over a small price difference!

- Don’t be taken in by any incentives to ‘sign that day’. Make it clear to them that you are speaking to a number of people and that you will make a decision when you have spoken to everyone you wish to.

- Do not compromise on anything that is on your ‘must have’ list. If they can’t or won’t provide this, walk away. Or if they say they can but there is conditions attached, be clear that you would rather go with a company that can assure you of delivery.

- Listen. Remember they are the experts. They may be able to offer you insightful input to make things easier for you.

Sign

-  Contact your favourite supplier and have them draw up a quote or contract stipulating all of your preferences and the terms you have agreed upon.

And that’s it, you’ve negotiated your contracts without fuss or pain!

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Civil Ceremonies in England and WalesPosted by Kim Rix on February 3rd, 2010

Dear Bride and Groom,

Civil ceremonies are one of the most popular wedding ceremonies which can be held either in a registry office or an ‘approved place’  (usually a hotel or other selected venue) of your choice.

It is important to note that if you choose to by wed by a registrar that they are not permitted, by law, to include any religious aspects into the ceremony. If including any kind of religious aspect is important to you (even a prayer) then I would strongly advise you to look further into a religious ceremony at your chosen place of worship.

Civil ceremonies are often short and sweet. The whole thing from start to finish usually lasts no more than around 20 minutes. Of course this can be extended by adding elements to your ceremony to personalise the day. I would always recommend that you select one or two songs or pieces of music which have significance to you both to be played at certain points of the ceremony and I also think that a number of readings by friends or family is a lovely touch. I must mention again that these selections must not be religious and if you have any doubt you should speak to your registrar.

There are a number of legalities that you have to go through in order to ensure that the marriage can be carried out legally. The points that follow are specific to England and Wales. If you are getting married in Scotland or Northern Ireland then the process is slightly different so please be careful to check with the local authority.

In England and Wales it is necessary to give notice in advance about the civil marriage or partnership. You need to have lived in the area where you intend to give notice for a minimum of seven days to satisfy residency requirements. You and your partner must give notice, in person, to your local registry office (even if they are different). It is also advised that if you are getting married in a different area that you contact the local office there at the same time to make sure that someone will be available.

In order to give notice you need to provide some simple information;

• Full name 
• Age – the minimum legal age in England and Wales is 16 years of age
• Address
• Nationality
• Current status – for example single, divorced
• Occupation

• Intended venue for your marriage or civil partnership

You may be required to prove your ID, status or nationality so double check you have a current passport, birth certificate and any documents relating to previous partnerships to hand.

The notice will then be publicly displayed for fifteen days after which authority is granted and the notice remains valid for a year, as long as the venue remains the same. 

If you are not getting married in the registry office then you will be required to pick up a Certificate of Authority to be given to the officiant conducting the ceremony in order for it to go ahead. Your registrar will contact you to arrange a time to pick this up.

The only other legal requirement is that during a civil ceremony or partnership a statutory ‘Declaratory’ and ‘Contracting’ statement must be read by the bride and groom to make the marriage lawful.

These statements are;

Declaratory Statement

I do solemnly declare that I know not of any lawful impediment why I, (your full name),

 may not be joined in matrimony to (your partner’s full name).

Contracting Statement

I call upon these persons here present to witness that I, (your full name),

 do take thee, (your partner’s full name),

to be my lawful wedded wife (or husband).

There are also more ‘modern’ versions that your registrar can advise you on when you meet.

For more information on the legality and process of civil or religious marriages please visit http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Governmentcitizensandrights/Yourrightsandresponsibilities/DG_10026937

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Delivering the personal service

Writing Your Wedding VowsPosted by Kim Rix on January 26th, 2010

Dear Bride and Groom,

I think it is really wonderful that so many couples I meet wish to write, and read their own vows on their wedding day. It certainly adds something incredibly personal to the ceremony and really lets your friends, family and partner get a sense of everything you are thinking and feeling on this special day.

I also know that it can be a daunting task to undertake as I’ve been there myself! You may not feel you are an eloquent writer or that you don’t know how to put everything into words. Often I see one person striving ahead and writing two or three versions of the script leaving the other panicking! Here are my two top tips if you are having trouble writing your vows;

• Keep it simple and say what you mean.
• Less doesn’t mean more. Keep it short!

It often helps if you can add a structure to your vows. For example start with a little background;

When I met you… (I knew I could never look at anyone in the same way I look at you)

On our first date…(I wished I could always make you smile)

The first time we were apart… (I realised I couldn’t live without you)

Moving in together… (I knew that home was where you were)

Getting engaged… (I put my heart in your hands)

Then turn these pivotal moments into your vows;

I promise I will only have eyes for you.

I will always make it my mission to see you smiling.

I will always be there for you. Near or far. Even in the times you don’t want me there.

I promise that our home will always be our haven and I will keep you safe forever.

I will let you carry my heart with you always, as you let me carry yours. 

You can choose any moments in your life together which you feel are special. Those moments that you recall together and laugh about or cry about and map those defining moment in your relationship which make it so special. They can be silly or touching or maybe even forgotten. This also helps to keep it truly personal to you.

And don’t feel you have to write them alone! Ask your partner to work with you and enjoy the experience of doing this special task together. When they hear the vows again on the day it will be like the first time.

I know that saying them out loud on the day could be a nerve wracking experience for you – especially if you are not a fan of public speaking!

Do not be afraid to rehearse! By repeating these vows to yourself over and over you will find they seed themselves so deeply that you won’t feel you have to wrack your brain to remember them and that they will come naturally.

You don’t need to learn them off by heart, and nerves may get the better of you so it is perfectly acceptable to carry a little note with you to prompt you if you get flustered.

Practice with your bridesmaids or groomsmen and speak as confidently and clearly as you can. Accept that you might get teary, and accept that its ok to be emotional. Take a deep breath and you can get to the end.

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Specialising in Luxury Weddings in London

Wedding Celebrations – It’s Not All Over!Posted by Kim Rix on January 5th, 2010

Dear Bride and Groom,

I hear a lot of couples (and their parents) talking about the wedding being only one day. That in 24 hours it has been and gone and then you just seamlessly roll on into married life.

I would like to dispel this myth! I have rarely (actually, probably never) been to or planned a wedding where there hasn’t been some social occasion directly related to it before or after the ‘ big day’ itself. It is an important time and it isn’t very often that you get to celebrate with friends and family in such a way so I would always encourage you to make the most of it. Here are a few of my suggestions.

Engagement Party

Starting right at the very beginning! It is becoming customary to have a party to officially announce your engagement. Naturally people want to celebrate the good news with you so why not make it easier. You could have an intimate dinner in the private dining room of your favourite restaurant, or a simple champagne and canapé reception in a nearby hotel or classy bar. If you want to keep things very low key you can have drinks and nibbles at your house (or your parent’s house for the more traditional couples).

Stag and Hen Parties

Wherever you are in the world it seems traditional to have a final separate ‘send off’ for the bride and groom. Organised predominantly by the Best Man and Maid/Matron of Honour the Stag or Hen celebration is a great warm up to your big day. All of your friends get to meet together – some for the first time – and throw caution to the wind.

If your idea of a good time is not dressing up in matching printed t-shirts and horns then that is absolutely ok! For the gents why not think about a day of paintballing or racetrack driving followed by a great hearty meal and drinks. Perhaps the ladies might like a pampering and photography session or a cocktail and chocolate making class followed by drinks and dancing.

You can always make a weekend out of it – I would always recommend a city break to your favourite European capital. You are almost certainly guaranteed good food and wine!

Mehndi Parties

Traditionally, Indian brides would get together with all of her female friends and family the night before the wedding and have a Mehndi Party. During this evening the bride would have beautifully, intricate henna tattoos painted on her hands and feet to be especially beautiful for her wedding.

Many UK brides are becoming more interested in Mehndi parties for their traditional wedding celebrations – sometimes playing a part in their hen party. Remember if you don’t want to have the tattoo on the day of your wedding then you should plan the party at least 6 weeks in advance to make sure it has worn off in time.

Rehearsal Dinner

I think that a rehearsal dinner is a very important part of your wedding planning and celebrations. It gives your bridal party an opportunity to settle into their roles and your family and friends an opportunity to get to know each other a little before the celebrations. Ideally it should be the evening before the wedding and not go on too late so you can be refreshed in the morning.

It should definitely have a relaxed atmosphere and a little of the couple’s personality shining through! Again, your favourite restaurant (or even your parent’s back garden) is a great way to get everyone together and talking.

And if you can’t manage the day before, why not consider a brunch the day after your wedding to thank your guests again for coming and let them look fondly on the previous days events.

Kind regards

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Luxury Weddings in London & Home Counties

How to Budget Your WeddingPosted by Kim Rix on December 8th, 2009

Dear Bride and Groom,

I cannot over emphasise the importance of budgeting.  Your whole wedding has to stem from this point. What is the total (the absolute maximum) that you are willing and able to spend on your wedding? Once you know this, for certain, write it down and make a promise to stick to it!

It is very easy to get carried away. It’s only an extra hundred for this and only another 10 of those, but you can quickly become carried away. You need to set out your budget right at the beginning and keep revisiting it to make sure you are on track.

I have created a really easy to use Interactive Budget Manager for my couples. Together we take the total budget for the wedding and allocate it to different ‘sections’ as a percentage. By thinking of different elements of your wedding in ‘sections’ or ‘chunks’ you will find this a much easier task. An example of a section could be; Attire, Entertainment or Reception. You can allocate more or less money to each section based on the percentage you allocate it, and tweak it to suit.

As I mentioned you also need to track what you actually spend. Your budget will be based on assumptions until you get solid quotes through, so you need to make sure that if things are costing a little more than anticipated, you spot it immediately in your budget and tweak other areas to make sure you come out even. And don’t forget that deposits count too! Even though you could be laying a deposit 2 – 3 years in advance make sure you include it in the total so you know realistically what you have spent.

The wonderful thing about working with a wedding planner is that they will spend the time to get you the best deal from the best suppliers. I would always advise speaking to a minimum of 3 suppliers for each element of your wedding. This way you can gauge the standard of their work, reliability and cost and take it all into consideration before making a decision. Savvy shopping will ensure you get the best from your budget!

I know of many couples that have taken out a loan or even re-mortgaged their home to pay for the wedding they desire. I would suggest that these are rather drastic measures that should only be taken if you are absolutely sure you can enjoy life fully after the wedding is over!

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Wedding & Events Planner

To start planning your wedding, contact Kim Rix on 0208 989 4886 or visit www.yourlondonweddingplanner.co.uk

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Wedding Insurance – Why You Need ItPosted by Kim Rix on November 10th, 2009

Dear Bride and Groom,

I know many couples that do not see the benefit or need to take out wedding insurance. But with the average wedding costing around eighteen thousand pounds it doesn’t seem unreasonable to take out protection. After all, you’d buy insurance for a new car that cost £18,000!

No one wants to think about anything going wrong on or leading up to their wedding day but at least with insurance you have the security of knowing that you won’t lose out financially if the worst does happen.

The most common claims on wedding insurance (and therefore my top reasons to buy it) are:

-         Damage to the wedding dress

-         Problems or cancellations with the wedding venue

-         Wedding suppliers going bust

-         Damage to photographs.

All of these things are just horrible to even imagine happening to you. But it is worth taking a moment and thinking about what you would be able to do in any of these situations. At the very least you would have to pay out for repairs and replacements on top of the likelihood of losing some very substantial deposits. Wedding insurance safeguards you from losing out financially and allows you to be able to cope with any problems that do arise.

Obviously each policy is different and you will perhaps need to look at a couple of different providers to find one that covers you for all the things that you are most concerned about. It is also a good idea to check the excess on the policy and see if you can lower or raise it to suit you.

Don’t forget to look for any optional extras. Some policies even come with discounts on other wedding services that could be worth looking at. With most policies available to look over online it is easy to shortlist a few favourites and then speak to the companies about any questions you have.

As most insurance providers now offer wedding insurance its worth speaking to some of your existing providers and see if they can offer you a discount for holding multiple policies. You might also want to check what could already be covered under existing home policies e.g. Wedding rings.

As part of my service I help couples to find insurance that suits their needs and sits within their budget. I think it is a really valuable service – although I hope you never have to use it!

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Choosing Your Wedding CakePosted by Kim Rix on October 27th, 2009

Dear Bride & Groom,

You may have a very clear idea of what you would like your wedding cake to look and taste like. However, here are a few things to consider when choosing or designing your cake.

1.      Flavours and Fillings

Wedding Cakes are available in many more types and flavours than the traditional fruit or the simple vanilla sponge. In order to cater for all tastes many brides choose to have different cake types for different tiers. Not only does it keep everyone happy but also allows you to be a bit adventurous!  Why not enquire about a chocolate sponge with a maraschino cherry crème. Perhaps a carrot cake is more your taste? Or maybe you’d like to try your favourite cheesecake.  

2.      Presentation

There are more possibilities than you would think for presenting your cake. You have the traditional stacked or pillared cakes, the stand option or the increasingly popular multiple cupcakes.  The stacked cake sees each layer placed directly one on top of each other – you need to make sure your top layers aren’t too heavy to support. The pillar cakes create a grand, tall cake with each layer rested expertly on top of pillars of your choice.  

Kim’s advice: icing sugar softens in warm weather (25°C+++). Despite the grand tier effect, it is advisable not to stack all three layers on top of each other to avoid the possibility of the top layer accidentally sliding off!

You may also choose a decorative stand, which can present multiple layers at different heights or layers without sinking into each other! Individual cupcakes displayed on modern or ‘classic’ cake stands can be eye-catching. You could choose different icings or toppings for each layer or even present them in your own formation.

3.             Theme

Obviously your theme should be carried through into your cake. Whether this is a colour scheme, a particular flower or motif. Even if you would like simple and classic, white, royal icing you could use coloured ribbon, sugar flowers or fresh flowers to carry on your colour theme and add a wow factor. It is incredible what can be made with delicate sugar craft.

You can ask your cake designer to give you ideas or present your own to see if it can be made. The best thing is that you can keep this edible delight for years to come.  Have a look through cake magazines for adventurous ideas and put your own spin on it.

4.             One Cake or Two?

This may not be too big a problem if you are having an intimate wedding, but if you are cutting your cake during the evening ‘party’ then you might need to consider having a ‘cutting cake’ in the kitchen to meet the demand of the guests.  This is especially helpful if you wish to keep the top tier for your 1^st wedding anniversary or your first child’s Christening – in which case you should make absolutely sure the cake is freshly made so it is safe to be frozen again!

Oh! And don’t forget that the tastings are the best part!

Kind regards

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Wedding Photography – Capturing The Special MomentsPosted by Kim Rix on October 9th, 2009

Dear Bride and Groom,

I was appalled to read of the terrible story of Marc and Sylvia Day in the Telegraph this week. They had over 400 images taken of the most important day in their lives, and only 22 of them were actually useable. Even the wedding video (which they hoped would redeem some of their loss) was disappointing and captured nothing of the spirit of the day.

Even though they have gained some compensation through the courts, nothing can possibly get them the photographs they truly desired. If you like you can read their story here: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/6263595/Couple-sue-wedding-photographer.html.

Even with the best of cameras there is much more to taking a great photograph than meets the eye, and wedding photography is a specialism. Finding a great photographer can take quite a lot of research and time. I like to help my clients by getting them to answer a few simple questions, then shortlisting a few photographers I think they would like based on their taste and requirements. I would then give them a little time to look over portfolios and example albums, speak directly to the photographer if they wish and suggest some ideas to suit their theme or budget.

The bits I can’t decide for you, but can certainly advise or give examples of, are the overall things like style. Most photographers are well rounded when it comes to their style of wedding photography. However, there are some who are particularly good at classic shots, some who prefer reportage photography and those who take advantage of the latest photographic manipulation.

A classic shot, is usually the posed group and solo photographs at weddings. Beautifully composed portraits with a soft, static feel. It is usually a good idea to have at least a few posed group and couple portraits of close family and friends, and of course the bridal party. These are especially favoured by older or distant relatives who can’t make it on the day.

Reportage photography is ideal for your evening event! These are photographs where you and your guests are caught totally naturally. A friendly smile across the dinner table, a wicked move on the dance floor or a delicate, loving glance can add a dynamic feel to your album. (These shouldn’t be confused with ‘candid’ shots that are posed pictures designed to look natural).

Then, in ‘post production’ your photographer can manipulate colours, lines and light to emphasise or enhance a photograph to give it an edgy or artistic feel.

You will know as you look through albums and portfolios exactly what styles you are happier with. I want my clients to hold and share these memories forever that is why I take great care to make absolutely sure its right.

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner