You will find that most of your time will be taken up thinking about your wedding reception. Although the ceremony is obviously the most important part of your day, the reception takes up the longest and most sociable part of your day (and night!).

Your reception can be simple and elegant, extravagant, exciting or intimate and calm. It really depends on what you want from it. The reception is likely to reflect a lot of your personality as a couple and this is what your guests will buy into and enjoy. The main thing is that your guests are well entertained and have a great time with you.

The Setting

The first thing you want to think about is where you want to be for your wedding reception. If you would like grand elegance then you might want to have a look at some of the National Trust properties that interest you. A good number have large banqueting halls, equipped with the most magnificent art, fittings and decorations. Some may even provide staff and scene settings in keeping of the period of the venue. There are plenty of privately owned stately homes and gardens that cater for weddings.

If you are looking for something a little different then you could look into hiring a yacht, getting exclusive use of your favourite restaurant, bar or even nightclub.

If you have a particular interest eg. Art, music or theatre then you can look into getting exclusive use of a favourite gallery, theatre or venue. You would be surprised at how many would be interested and accommodating.

The Entertainment

This might be dictated by your wedding venue a little. For example, if you choose a theatre venue, then you could have a small interesting performance followed by live music. In a stately home you might want a string quartet or traditional music for the meal and then a 5 or 6 piece band for some late night dancing.

But what can you offer apart from music? How about a wandering magician? One or two can be available to demonstrate and wow your guests with impressive table magic – don’t worry no clowning or balloon creatures!!

Give your guests something to take home by asking a caricaturist to draw guests on each table at their request. It’s a great conversation starter!

If you have any gardens available then you could look at hiring a croquet set, jenga set or chess set for your guests to play with – you will be surprised at how keen your guests will be to get involved, and again its great for getting people talking!

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Freeing up YOUR time and delivering the personal service

So what if it goes all wrong? What if the caterers mess up your food, or the cake doesn’t arrive? What if the DJ is awful and your photographer gets sick? What if the weather is awful and your guests are soaked during the garden ceremony and to top it all of there is a massive family argument??

First of all. Breathe.

 Second of all. This, most likely will not happen to you.

Thirdly. If anything does happen, you can handle it. And this is how:

Cool as a cucumber

You may want to throw a big hissy fit or burst into tears but that is not going to help and it only makes you look bad! So if you hear any bad news the first thing to do is take a moment, process it, say ‘ok’ and follow it up with ‘how do we solve this?’.

The bearer of the bad news has probably come up with several solutions on their way to find you. Listen to them all, ask your bridesmaid or best man for their opinion and let them get on with it!

People will respect and admire your amazing calm head and ability to take it in their stride. It’s also more likely to come to a pleasing solution quicker than if you have a screaming match!

Turn It On Its Head

Ok, so your guests are soaked through. It’s not pleasant but its now the huge talking point of your big day so document it!! Ask your photographer to get as many photos as they can while people are still outside and willing to pose, get them to do something wacky and let loose. There is also the potential for a lovely series of warming up and drying out shots. Beautiful, personal portraiture or people wrapped in towels or fixing themselves.

I was once at a wedding in a hotel where the fire alarm went off and the whole place had to be evacuated just as the evening reception was getting underway. The fire engines arrived and it was thankfully a false alarm. While waiting to get back into the hotel the Groom took some initiative and asked one of the firemen if they would turn on the engine lights and the couple had a romantic, silent first dance in the glow of the dancing lights. They also have a cracking photo of his mother in law with one of the fireman. Totally unforgettable.

Any disaster can be handled coolly, turned on its head and made into something truly unique and exciting about your wedding. Focus on your guests having fun and your family being happy. The rest will fall into place.

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Saving you time and delivering the personal service

I have been asked on a few occasions for advice surrounding what you should do if your parents are divorced and you are getting married. For some people this isn’t an issue at all but for others it can be really troubling.

The first thing to decide is if you want both of your parents (and their new partners if they have them) there at all. If you haven’t had much of a relationship with one of your parents since the divorce (especially if you were a child at the time) then you shouldn’t feel pressured into inviting them for the full day. If you want to invite them to the evening only, then that is what you should do.

I understand that these decisions can be difficult and you should take your time over them. Remember that this day is about your happiness and enjoyment and if you are going to be distracted or on edge then you should avoid it.

If you get on well with both of your parents and they are both coming to your wedding then there may be a few more things to consider. Will you be having a top table? And if so are both of your parents (and potentially new partners) going to be sitting there. You can always opt for a ‘sweetheart’ table for just the bride and groom if you think this may be difficult.

If your parents are not on the best of terms and you want to try and keep them occupied and apart at all times then I would usually suggest that you assign one of your friends (preferably not family) to keep an eye on them and intercept at any moments they feel may be appropriate. You can feel safe in knowing that someone is looking out and it takes the pressure off of you.

There are no real answers or correct things to do. You have to go with your instincts as much as possible and what will make your day the least stressful and the most fun that it can be.

I hope that helps.

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Everyone loves weddings, and I promise everybody will love yours, but if there is ever a complaint it is always about having to ‘wait around’. There is inevitably always going to be a little time when your guests will be waiting for a short time. You can of course be smart about it and recognize where these lulls may be and arrange a little activity or distraction to keep them occupied.

The largest lull is always between the ceremony and wedding breakfast when the photographs are usually taken. If you are having the reception at a different venue from the ceremony then a little of the time will be taken up by traveling, and the rest with a lovely champagne or drinks reception when they arrive. It will also take a little time to get settled in to the new venue and to find their way around.

If you are having the reception in the same venue as the ceremony then a little more activity may be needed to occupy your guests for this short waiting period.

If you’re in a unique or unusual venue then the simplest thing to do would be to offer a short guided tour of the building and its grounds. Most buildings of this nature will happily provide this service – some guides may even dress in the period of the day and give a much livelier performance than a talk.

If there are substantial grounds or garden areas that you can use then it might be a refreshing idea to provide some lawn games alongside an outside drinks reception. A lovely English favourite would be sipping Pimms, nibbling some fresh strawberries and playing a little croquet. You can also hire giant outdoor chess sets, jenga or other games to try.

You could always ask your photographer for a number of whole wedding shots or family groupings outside of the traditional formats. This makes everyone feel special and included – although this may not be easy in large weddings!

Why not look into creating a little treasure hunt, fun quiz or getting to know you game? Remember the one where you get a famous person’s name and stick it to your forehead then have to ask questions to find out who you are? Silly, yes. But a fabulous ice-breaker, very simple and super easy to manage!

Whatever you decide to do, don’t be afraid to try something a little different. You will actually have much less time than you think!!

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

For most couples their wedding day is quite a big family affair. After all, you are both gaining a whole new family before the day is out! Your friends will also be there to enjoy the day with you, support you and wish you well on your new life together.

Many couples like to include or involve their friends or family a little more than just having them along on the day. There are a variety of different ways you can do this and make them feel like they have really contributed.

1. Bridal Party

The ‘highest’ honour is asking your friends and family members to be in your bridal party. Whether you choose to have one bridesmaid or 4 groomsmen is totally up to you. There is no reason why you can’t have a bridesman or a groomslady either!

If you want to give a little nod to a close friend or aunt / uncle with children then consider asking them if their child could be a ring bearer, page boy or flower girl. I guarantee they will be touched.

2. Assign Duties

You will need help on the day, not just in the planning process. Ask your trusted and reliable friends or family members to carry out some specific tasks for you. It could be as simple as making sure your mum always has a full glass of champagne, keeping your dad and your step dad apart, or promising to be the first on the dance floor!

3. Utilise their skills!

Do your friends or family members have any special skills? Think about what they are good at and see if you can fit them into your wedding. Perhaps you have a grandma who is an amazing baker who could make your cake. Maybe your best friend is an interior decorator and he/she’d like to help decorate the venue?

4. Create Together

If you are having a particularly ‘hands-on’ wedding then why not gather your friends and family together to make things for your wedding over a night, weekend or several evenings where you get to socialize and contribute in a big way too. I’m thinking about handmade table decorations, favours, place-cards… (lots of inspiration at http://www.marthastewartweddings.com/photogallery/decoration-templates#slide_1)

5. Say Something

Asking your close friend or family to speak either during the ceremony or at the reception is a lovely way to be included. Whether it’s a specially selected reading chosen by you (or them) or a speech from the heart, it is a perfectly simple and touching way to get involved.

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

So, how soon is it until your big day? Years? Months? DAYS!?

Do you know everything that you have to get done before then? And when it has to be done by?

Even if you feel like you are in control and on top of everything, I can promise you that the closer you get to your wedding, the more likely you are to drop the ball and miss something. There is a lot to consider, a lot to book and a lot to check.

I had an awful call one time from a bride who had suddenly realised they had forgotten to submit the Marriage Notice Forms to the registrar in time and were now in danger of not being able to be married at all! You would be surprised how often this does happen. 

This is why I cannot stress to you enough the important of creating (and sticking to!) a checklist and timeline for all aspects of your wedding. You can create this as far in advance as possible and just amend as you go. It also means if you have friends and family helping, they can have copies and make sure they are fulfilling their tasks in time, and support you in anything that you need. And that might just be a gentle reminder about setting an appointment or paying a second instalment etc.

How you create, or where you create your checklist is up to you! You might want to make an excel spreadsheet, perhaps you are happy logging tasks into your computer calendar or maybe it’s a paper diary, but you need something!

When you are putting in your tasks you want to work backwards from your wedding date (and even give yourself an extra week in there for breathing room). There are plenty of resources, calendars and advice available in books or online that can prompt you for things you might want to add. And don’t forget that friends or parents that have been through this have plenty of advice to give you – and you should listen to it too!

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Delivering the personal service

Have you ever had that experience when you are engaging someone to carry out some work for you – whether its fitting a bathroom, servicing your car or excavating your garden – that you have a ‘feeling’ you are not going to get on with them?

That is not you being picky. That’s just your common sense kicking in highlighting that in some way your personalities clash. It could be something small and it may not affect the job at all, but you hesitate nonetheless. I’m not necessarily talking about trust here, but about the way you can communicate.

When you are engaging someone to provide a product or service for your wedding I think it’s important that your personalities match. Why? Because you are probably going to have to speak to them a lot – and during some times when you are fairly stressed out!

I would always advise my brides (or grooms) to ‘interview’ at least 3 different vendors before making a decision. A simple conversation can be enough and usually your gut instinct will tell you who you should work with.

Let me give you an example.

I was working with a fairly successful, strong-willed and organized bride about 6 months ago. We were visiting a number of florists that day and I had picked 2 for the morning that I thought she might like.

The first florist was a local vendor, fairly new to the area having just branched out on her own, but very experienced in wedding flowers. She talked through all the ideas with the bride, explained different options and showed examples. She then talked through how she would sketch out designs and send email them to her for approval so they could discuss changes without having to see each other face to face. Everything was very detailed, clear and the florist seemed totally in control.

The second florist, also a local vendor, but more established with a number of awards under her belt was much more informal. She asked about colours and flower types, took an address and said she’d be happy to send on a quote. She offered a few books to look at and point out anything that the bride liked. The whole encounter was very informal, chatty and pleasant.

Can you guess which florist my bride chose? Of course, the first! Although she thought the second florist seemed great she realized that her laid back personality would just send her into a panic. She felt the first had a reassuring business-like quality that she could relate to.

Don’t worry about judging people. They completely understand! And remember its just as hard for them to do their job if your personalities are clashing!

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Luxury Weddings in London, South East and the UK

You may have been reading this blog for a little while, or perhaps this is your first visit but you may have noticed that I offer up a lot of advice to you here. I imagined that you were perhaps starting to wonder what you could use me for if I’m giving you all my tips! Well here are a few things to demonstrate exactly what a wedding planner does for you.

Where has the time gone?

Whether you have 2 years or 2 months to plan your wedding, you never have enough time. If one or both of you are working it is even harder to find the time to call venues, suppliers etc to organize meetings, check details etc – especially when most of them are working the same hours as you are!

As a wedding planner I have the time to get information, check details, call, meet, negotiate and secure all the services you need. Believe me, it’s a lot of work and you don’t want to feel like you are making decisions in a rush!

Delegate Delegate Delegate

If you are planning a wedding on your own it is most likely that you will delegate some tasks out to friends and family to help you. But when and how do you check up on them? And what if they haven’t completed what they asked you to? Or it’s not the way you would like it to be?

If I were helping you to plan your wedding you would know every detail would be catered for and every request met, at a timetable to suit you!

Idea Generator

It can be difficult to think or be imaginative about what you want your wedding to be like when you are under pressure to get dates set, write guest lists etc. Maybe you have an idea but you have no idea how to make it a reality.

I would be at your side to translate your ideas into reality. You tell me what you are looking for, I research some ideas for you and all you have to do is choose! I can pick up on all the little details that will make it extra special for you. And you can focus on that invite list!

Contracts and Negotiation

As I have a good reputation with many suppliers, contractors and venues I can secure you great rates, excellent service and the best in the business. Negotiating can be nerve wracking and time consuming. I can take that swiftly off of your hands!

The Day

The Big Day, is your day. You should be able to enjoy it. If you are stressing about timetables, deliveries, schedules etc you will not be concentrating on enjoying yourself!

As your wedding planner I will be there to ensure that everything runs perfectly smoothly. I am your go to person, so if you have a question or request you just need to whisper in my ear and its done!

And the beauty of it is your guests won’t have a clue – they’ll just be having a wonderful time!

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Delivering the Personal Service

I know that some of you will have read the title and panicked already! I find that, generally speaking, a lot of people are afraid of negotiation. There is a fear that you won’t get what you want or you will be overpowered by the other party’s persuasiveness or slick style.

First of all…Everyone can negotiate! It’s all about knowing what you want, what you are willing to back down on and how to arm yourself for success! Think about it. You negotiate with your partner all the time. It might be about the destination of your holiday, the date of your wedding or which restaurant you want to go to that weekend.

Think about these simple things when you are negotiating a contract and you will be cool, confident and come out with what you want.

Prepare!

- Make a list of exactly what you want from the supplier or service provider. (As much detail as possible if you can!)

- Make a list of a few things that you would be happy to compromise on if it came to it. Eg. A change in delivery time, one less vegetarian option, eustoma instead of sweet peas.

- Set a limit to how much you are willing to spend.

- Shop around and get a few separate quotes and recommendations.

- Shortlist your favourite suppliers and arrange meetings.

Discuss

- Take your notes with you to the meeting.

- Take plenty of notes about what they tell you and discuss any comparisons with other companies / suppliers with them. They will work hard to secure your business – especially if it’s over a small price difference!

- Don’t be taken in by any incentives to ‘sign that day’. Make it clear to them that you are speaking to a number of people and that you will make a decision when you have spoken to everyone you wish to.

- Do not compromise on anything that is on your ‘must have’ list. If they can’t or won’t provide this, walk away. Or if they say they can but there is conditions attached, be clear that you would rather go with a company that can assure you of delivery.

- Listen. Remember they are the experts. They may be able to offer you insightful input to make things easier for you.

Sign

-  Contact your favourite supplier and have them draw up a quote or contract stipulating all of your preferences and the terms you have agreed upon.

And that’s it, you’ve negotiated your contracts without fuss or pain!

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Civil ceremonies are one of the most popular wedding ceremonies which can be held either in a registry office or an ‘approved place’  (usually a hotel or other selected venue) of your choice.

It is important to note that if you choose to by wed by a registrar that they are not permitted, by law, to include any religious aspects into the ceremony. If including any kind of religious aspect is important to you (even a prayer) then I would strongly advise you to look further into a religious ceremony at your chosen place of worship.

Civil ceremonies are often short and sweet. The whole thing from start to finish usually lasts no more than around 20 minutes. Of course this can be extended by adding elements to your ceremony to personalise the day. I would always recommend that you select one or two songs or pieces of music which have significance to you both to be played at certain points of the ceremony and I also think that a number of readings by friends or family is a lovely touch. I must mention again that these selections must not be religious and if you have any doubt you should speak to your registrar.

There are a number of legalities that you have to go through in order to ensure that the marriage can be carried out legally. The points that follow are specific to England and Wales. If you are getting married in Scotland or Northern Ireland then the process is slightly different so please be careful to check with the local authority.

In England and Wales it is necessary to give notice in advance about the civil marriage or partnership. You need to have lived in the area where you intend to give notice for a minimum of seven days to satisfy residency requirements. You and your partner must give notice, in person, to your local registry office (even if they are different). It is also advised that if you are getting married in a different area that you contact the local office there at the same time to make sure that someone will be available.

In order to give notice you need to provide some simple information;

• Full name 
• Age – the minimum legal age in England and Wales is 16 years of age
• Address
• Nationality
• Current status – for example single, divorced
• Occupation

• Intended venue for your marriage or civil partnership

You may be required to prove your ID, status or nationality so double check you have a current passport, birth certificate and any documents relating to previous partnerships to hand.

The notice will then be publicly displayed for fifteen days after which authority is granted and the notice remains valid for a year, as long as the venue remains the same. 

If you are not getting married in the registry office then you will be required to pick up a Certificate of Authority to be given to the officiant conducting the ceremony in order for it to go ahead. Your registrar will contact you to arrange a time to pick this up.

The only other legal requirement is that during a civil ceremony or partnership a statutory ‘Declaratory’ and ‘Contracting’ statement must be read by the bride and groom to make the marriage lawful.

These statements are;

Declaratory Statement

I do solemnly declare that I know not of any lawful impediment why I, (your full name),

 may not be joined in matrimony to (your partner’s full name).

Contracting Statement

I call upon these persons here present to witness that I, (your full name),

 do take thee, (your partner’s full name),

to be my lawful wedded wife (or husband).

There are also more ‘modern’ versions that your registrar can advise you on when you meet.

For more information on the legality and process of civil or religious marriages please visit http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Governmentcitizensandrights/Yourrightsandresponsibilities/DG_10026937

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Delivering the personal service