Dear Bride & Groom,

You’ve no doubt heard of the old English wedding tradition – Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue. And a silver sixpence in her shoe.”

This is an old English wedding tradition and began in the Victorian era. Each item in this poem represents a good-luck token for the bride. If she carries all of them on her wedding day, her marriage will be happy.

“Something old” symbolizes continuity with the bride’s family and the past.

“Something new” means optimism and hope for the bride’s new life ahead.

“Something borrowed” is usually an item from a happily married friend or family member, whose good fortune in marriage is supposed to carry over to the new bride.

The borrowed item also reminds the bride that she can depend on her friends and family.

Wearing something blue dates back to biblical times when the colour blue was considered to represent purity and fidelity. Over time this has evolved from wearing blue clothing to wearing a blue band around the bottom of the bride’s dress and to modern times where the bride wears a blue or blue-trimmed garter.

And finally, a sixpence in the bride’s shoe represents wealth and financial security. This is not just to bring the bride financial wealth but also a wealth of happiness and joy throughout her married life.

So where does this take us? Well, I was recently searching for ideas for unique gifts for a bride to give to her Groom, or the Groom to his bestman.  One bride I recently worked with gave her betrothed handmade silver cufflinks, engraved with the date of their wedding. A lovely romantic gesture no less, but when I came across this particular website, I felt inspired – wedding cufflinks made out of old coins – including the English sixpences which are used in the old traditional wedding poem. Check it out: http://www.worldcoincufflinks.com/category/englishcufflinks

I’m all for tradition (as well as breaking the rules), but I’d love to hear from a bride who actually limped around with a coin in her shoe on her wedding day.  Go on, hands up

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Dear Brides and Esteemed Wedding Professionals,

I thought I’d write something a bit different today. I want to share with you how I use Twitter in my every day job as a wedding & event planner/coordinator.

Firstly, some background – I’ve been tweeting for about eighteen months now. Initially, I followed a tweetmentor programme written by Nikki Pilkington. As of today, I’ve Tweeted 1272 times. I have 635 followers and I’m following 162. I generally tweet only when I have something useful to say.

Why do I tweet? I tweet for multiple reasons – it’s fun; I like reading what people are up to, letting the world know about my latest comings and goings, and having the odd conversation – but, overall, I tweet because I want to demonstrate my expertise, position myself as an expert, build trust and ultimately, get more business.

Is it time well spent? I believe it is.

So what do I tweet about?

- I tweet about upcoming wedding events and wedding shows in London.

- I tweet links to other professional wedding vendors I’ve had the pleasure of meeting.

- I tweet to offer my wedding services and expertise as a wedding planner & coordinator in London (but I aim to keep the blatant self-promotion to a minimum).

- I tweet links that may be of interest to discerning brides – usually about luxury venues and other bespoke wedding products & services.

- I retweet information that others have tweeted that I think brides may be interested in.

- I sometimes tweet links to other wedding planner’s blogs.

- I tweet questions, and sometimes retweet the answers I’m given.

- I tweet when I hear about a red-hot competition that offers a unique opportunity or ‘must have’ prize for the bride & groom

- I tweet from the roof-tops when someone has sent me a lovely ‘thank you’

So that’s how I use Twitter, and what you can expect if you follow me. Hopefully you’ll be sending me a “Hello” message @kimrix very soon!

Warm regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

“Giving you the attention you deserve”

Dear Bride & Groom,

A couple of weeks ago I coordinated a fabulous wedding reception event in East London.  If you’re a Londoner or here on holiday, you’ll know that the weather has been absolutely sizzling for the last few weeks – not your typical UK Summer temperatures, as last experienced in July 2006. So, when I was informed that the wedding flowers were being collected from Covent Garden Flower Market more than 36 hours in advance of the wedding event, I felt somewhat uneasy. So I decided to ask Elizabeth Marsh, an award-winning florist, what she advises Brides about “how to prolong the life of your flowers and make sure they are at their best for your wedding or special event”.  Here’s her response:

“A gas called ethylene, which is colourless and odourless, is produced by the old flowers and vegetables, amongst others, and can significantly reduce the life of your flowers.  It is important therefore to keep flowers away from fruit and vegetables (eg the fruit bowl might be out of bounds), smoke in the atmosphere etc and make sure that storage areas for the flowers are well ventilated.  It also helps to keep them cool, as this reduces their sensitivity to ethylene.

Insects and disease can also affect flowers, especially an infection called ‘gray mould’ which can result if the flowers become wet, for example if too many flowers are crammed into one bucket on a hot day and the flowers sweat and so become damp.  If the flowers are left in a box, eg for transportation purposes, and that box is left in the heat at all, once it cools down the condensed moisture could well result in spoilage. Finally, storing flowers for too long even under the correct conditions can also leave the flowers susceptible to gray mould.  One other factor that renders flowers prone to infection is damage when conditioning them.  For this reason always use a sharp knife to cut the stems, handle the heads as little as possible, and be careful not to hold them too tightly.

As cut flowers are removed from the source of food that has sustained them so far, adding a little sugar to the water whilst conditioning them will help to boost them, although after a few hours it might be best to remove them from the sugar solution and put them in plain water.  The addition of sugar can enable the buds to develop properly, attain larger sizes and last longer.  However be careful not add too much sugar as this can damage the foliage on some flowers. 

Some flowers, especially some tropical varieties can sustain chilling damage if refrigerated, so be careful with anthuriums, gerberas, heliconias bouvardia, orchids, birds of paradise etc– these might be better left out of the fridge (if you have one).

Finally, dirty water in the vase or the bucket will produce algae which are sucked up the flower stem and cause blockages so that the flower cannot drink water any more.  To keep the water clean, change it daily, recut the stems each time to remove the initial stages of rot from the tips and possibly add a little bleach.

These are just a few of the things you can do to ensure you have perfect flowers for your special occasion.”

Source: Dr J. N. Sacalis: commercial floral design

Your London Wedding Planner

Freeing up your time and delivering the personal service

Dear Bride and Groom,

You will find that most of your time will be taken up thinking about your wedding reception. Although the ceremony is obviously the most important part of your day, the reception takes up the longest and most sociable part of your day (and night!).

Your reception can be simple and elegant, extravagant, exciting or intimate and calm. It really depends on what you want from it. The reception is likely to reflect a lot of your personality as a couple and this is what your guests will buy into and enjoy. The main thing is that your guests are well entertained and have a great time with you.

The Setting

The first thing you want to think about is where you want to be for your wedding reception. If you would like grand elegance then you might want to have a look at some of the National Trust properties that interest you. A good number have large banqueting halls, equipped with the most magnificent art, fittings and decorations. Some may even provide staff and scene settings in keeping of the period of the venue. There are plenty of privately owned stately homes and gardens that cater for weddings.

If you are looking for something a little different then you could look into hiring a yacht, getting exclusive use of your favourite restaurant, bar or even nightclub.

If you have a particular interest eg. Art, music or theatre then you can look into getting exclusive use of a favourite gallery, theatre or venue. You would be surprised at how many would be interested and accommodating.

The Entertainment

This might be dictated by your wedding venue a little. For example, if you choose a theatre venue, then you could have a small interesting performance followed by live music. In a stately home you might want a string quartet or traditional music for the meal and then a 5 or 6 piece band for some late night dancing.

But what can you offer apart from music? How about a wandering magician? One or two can be available to demonstrate and wow your guests with impressive table magic – don’t worry no clowning or balloon creatures!!

Give your guests something to take home by asking a caricaturist to draw guests on each table at their request. It’s a great conversation starter!

If you have any gardens available then you could look at hiring a croquet set, jenga set or chess set for your guests to play with – you will be surprised at how keen your guests will be to get involved, and again its great for getting people talking!

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Freeing up YOUR time and delivering the personal service

Dear Bride and Groom,

I have been asked on a few occasions for advice surrounding what you should do if your parents are divorced and you are getting married. For some people this isn’t an issue at all but for others it can be really troubling.

The first thing to decide is if you want both of your parents (and their new partners if they have them) there at all. If you haven’t had much of a relationship with one of your parents since the divorce (especially if you were a child at the time) then you shouldn’t feel pressured into inviting them for the full day. If you want to invite them to the evening only, then that is what you should do.

I understand that these decisions can be difficult and you should take your time over them. Remember that this day is about your happiness and enjoyment and if you are going to be distracted or on edge then you should avoid it.

If you get on well with both of your parents and they are both coming to your wedding then there may be a few more things to consider. Will you be having a top table? And if so are both of your parents (and potentially new partners) going to be sitting there. You can always opt for a ‘sweetheart’ table for just the bride and groom if you think this may be difficult.

If your parents are not on the best of terms and you want to try and keep them occupied and apart at all times then I would usually suggest that you assign one of your friends (preferably not family) to keep an eye on them and intercept at any moments they feel may be appropriate. You can feel safe in knowing that someone is looking out and it takes the pressure off of you.

There are no real answers or correct things to do. You have to go with your instincts as much as possible and what will make your day the least stressful and the most fun that it can be.

I hope that helps.

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Dear Bride and Groom,

Everyone loves weddings, and I promise everybody will love yours, but if there is ever a complaint it is always about having to ‘wait around’. There is inevitably always going to be a little time when your guests will be waiting for a short time. You can of course be smart about it and recognize where these lulls may be and arrange a little activity or distraction to keep them occupied.

The largest lull is always between the ceremony and wedding breakfast when the photographs are usually taken. If you are having the reception at a different venue from the ceremony then a little of the time will be taken up by traveling, and the rest with a lovely champagne or drinks reception when they arrive. It will also take a little time to get settled in to the new venue and to find their way around.

If you are having the reception in the same venue as the ceremony then a little more activity may be needed to occupy your guests for this short waiting period.

If you’re in a unique or unusual venue then the simplest thing to do would be to offer a short guided tour of the building and its grounds. Most buildings of this nature will happily provide this service – some guides may even dress in the period of the day and give a much livelier performance than a talk.

If there are substantial grounds or garden areas that you can use then it might be a refreshing idea to provide some lawn games alongside an outside drinks reception. A lovely English favourite would be sipping Pimms, nibbling some fresh strawberries and playing a little croquet. You can also hire giant outdoor chess sets, jenga or other games to try.

You could always ask your photographer for a number of whole wedding shots or family groupings outside of the traditional formats. This makes everyone feel special and included – although this may not be easy in large weddings!

Why not look into creating a little treasure hunt, fun quiz or getting to know you game? Remember the one where you get a famous person’s name and stick it to your forehead then have to ask questions to find out who you are? Silly, yes. But a fabulous ice-breaker, very simple and super easy to manage!

Whatever you decide to do, don’t be afraid to try something a little different. You will actually have much less time than you think!!

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Dear Bride and Groom,

For most couples their wedding day is quite a big family affair. After all, you are both gaining a whole new family before the day is out! Your friends will also be there to enjoy the day with you, support you and wish you well on your new life together.

Many couples like to include or involve their friends or family a little more than just having them along on the day. There are a variety of different ways you can do this and make them feel like they have really contributed.

1. Bridal Party

The ‘highest’ honour is asking your friends and family members to be in your bridal party. Whether you choose to have one bridesmaid or 4 groomsmen is totally up to you. There is no reason why you can’t have a bridesman or a groomslady either!

If you want to give a little nod to a close friend or aunt / uncle with children then consider asking them if their child could be a ring bearer, page boy or flower girl. I guarantee they will be touched.

2. Assign Duties

You will need help on the day, not just in the planning process. Ask your trusted and reliable friends or family members to carry out some specific tasks for you. It could be as simple as making sure your mum always has a full glass of champagne, keeping your dad and your step dad apart, or promising to be the first on the dance floor!

3. Utilise their skills!

Do your friends or family members have any special skills? Think about what they are good at and see if you can fit them into your wedding. Perhaps you have a grandma who is an amazing baker who could make your cake. Maybe your best friend is an interior decorator and he/she’d like to help decorate the venue?

4. Create Together

If you are having a particularly ‘hands-on’ wedding then why not gather your friends and family together to make things for your wedding over a night, weekend or several evenings where you get to socialize and contribute in a big way too. I’m thinking about handmade table decorations, favours, place-cards… (lots of inspiration at http://www.marthastewartweddings.com/photogallery/decoration-templates#slide_1)

5. Say Something

Asking your close friend or family to speak either during the ceremony or at the reception is a lovely way to be included. Whether it’s a specially selected reading chosen by you (or them) or a speech from the heart, it is a perfectly simple and touching way to get involved.

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

Dear Bride and Groom,

I thought I would share with you a conversation I had with a potential client a few days ago. I won’t name her to avoid her feeling any more self conscious – I’ll say this now before she panics.

Basically she is marrying her long-term girlfriend in a civil partnership and she was asking about the etiquette of same sex weddings. Are they the same as heterosexual weddings? Would people have certain expectations of her wedding because it was between two women? And the answer to that is, its your wedding. Only you and your partner can decide what kind of wedding you want and its based entirely on your personality – not your sexuality!

If you are a gay couple that loves camp and flamboyant, then do camp and flamboyant! If you are a lesbian couple that enjoys sailing, then have a nautical theme. You shouldn’t let society or other people’s opinions dictate the decisions you make. Your friends and family are coming to see you get married. They expect only to see you comfortable, happy and having a wonderful time. They want to see little aspects of your personality and the things you enjoy littered throughout the day.

I understand that there are still a number of people who would be uncomfortable in talking about same sex marriages, let alone going to one. I also think it is important to remember that in the UK, it is your right to be able to marry the person that you want to spend the rest of your life with and to be treated equally with others.

Do not compromise your dreams and your wishes in fear of other people’s opinions!! A great wedding is a great wedding regardless of who is getting married. Make the most of it – and I’m happy to help!

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

 Your London Wedding Planner

“Freeing up your time and delivering the personal service”

Dear Bride and Groom,

As your big day draws ever closer both you and your guests will be thinking about wedding gifts. Even 6 – 8 months in advance you might find people asking if you have any idea what you would like.

I was recently asked when giving a bridal consultation about what happens when guests are only invited to the reception and not the full day. Are they expected to bring a gift? Should you send them information of any registered lists that you have?

Being honest, there are no particular rules on gift giving. Generally speaking I would not send my evening invite guests information of any gift registers. But there are a few exceptions eg:

- the wedding ceremony itself is a very small affair (perhaps due to venue restrictions) and the majority of guests are only invited to the wedding reception

- the wedding itself is abroad and this is a 2^nd celebration which all guests are invited to.

In most cases I would expect no more than a card from evening guests although you will find that many will give you a small gift or cash to go alongside it. If I was attending an evening wedding reception then I suppose I would make my choice based on how well I know the couple. For example, if I am invited as a friend of the parents of the bride or groom then a card is probably adequate. If I am invited as a long-term acquaintance then I would most likely give a monetary token, gift voucher or a small but thoughtful gift.

As the Bride and Groom, you can let guests know simply if you would not like to receive any gifts. Just add a little line to your invite stating that you only need the gift of their presence.

As guests, you probably have an idea of the couple’s personality and what they might expect from you. With this you just have to go with your gut!

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner

“Freeing up your time“

Dear Bride and Groom,

You may have read recently about the latest wedding stats showing that marriages in England and Wales are at their lowest point since records began in 1862. I found this quite astonishing. I’m sure, like me, you always seem to know someone who is getting married – in fact I know a number of people who plan their holidays purely around their friend’s or family weddings each year! On the other hand I suppose I do know a large number of couples who co-habit and haven’t thought about, or just don’t want to get married. Thirty years ago this would have seemed unusual, but now it is becoming commonplace.

Although there have been peaks and troughs in the number of marriages since 1862 the drastic decline since 1985 is unprecedented. What was a rather jagged spiky zigzag has turned into a straight line heading south.

The other really interesting thing is at the same time the number of divorces is at its lowest in 29 years. So less people are getting married, but they are staying together. Thinking about it in this way is quite warming. When people decide they want to commit to each other and get married they are entering into it very seriously and they are making it work.

It is hard to know what to take from these statistics. Of course, I believe that marriage is a beautiful and important commitment to your partner. The couples that I see get married are happy and loving and they see it as a way to show the other person their true feelings. I also see more couples resisting the idea of marriage and I wonder if we need to rethink how we ‘sell’ it to people now. What is it that is putting people off of the idea and what would make them change their mind?

It will be interesting to see if any more research will be done into this topic.

And if you are reading this and wondering about whether you should get married…perhaps the question is, why not?

Kind regards,

Kim Rix

Your London Wedding Planner